Goodbye 2012: Loss, Love and Life

I have no idea where 2012 went.   The older I get, the years fly so fast I barely remember them.  Or anything else.

I wanted to write a funny post; maybe a list of reasons I’m glad to say goodbye to 2012.

But at this age I’d rather hang onto any year than say goodbye to it.

I’m also feeling more like reflecting  than reveling.

Plus, this blog is meant to be authentic; and truthfully, looking back at this year,  I think of loss.   (Not even counting the very last thing I lost in 2012:  a filling from a tooth.)

Last year began with the loss of my children’s father, my ex- husband.

And more followed—as a country, we shared losses like Sandy Hook and Hurricane Sandy;  and  just within my personal circle, the loss of homes, spouses, children, jobs—pretty much everything.  (Except loss of weight—not that I am making light of a serious subject.)

Despite the losses, my year was also filled with joy, love; and a full life.

Loss.  Love.  Life.  They’re so closely entwined they’re almost inseparable.

To have any of them is to have all of them.

Maybe the older I get, the more I see how much they blend together.

So  2013 will also be a year of loss (hopefully fillings, not people)— and also a year full of love, full of life.

At the risk of sounding even more like a greeting card than I already do,   Loss is most of all where depth of spirit and humanity shines through.

For me no one exemplifies that better than a friend who very recently suffered  a loss that is devastating and unimaginable.  Honestly I don’t know how she gets out of bed and gets through a day, much less finds exquisite and eloquent ways to express herself at her time of greatest sorrow.    I’m borrowing her words since they inspire me:

 How breathtakingly beautiful it is to be here in this life. We have limited control, though we’d like to think otherwise. Anything can and does happen. Fair has nothing to do with it. This mess of joy and pain, rage, boredom, hilarity, moments of peace is simply the ‘what is’. When I open myself to what is, I find I can love the whole of it.

I hope this  (tragedy) won’t have cast life in a bad light for you. I hope in the New Year it will remind you to live, love, laugh, relish, suffer and learn with abandon.


I can’t think of a better wish for all of us in 2013.

Happy New Year.


  1. I couldn’t agree with you more! As I sat there last night thinking about 2012 at how I was going to thrive rather than just suvive another year, I hoped I had journaled the good things that happened in 2012 because sometimes it seems that the tragedies over take our memories. It definitely has to become a choice to focus on all the good things, and not let all the losses get us down. Whenever one faces in this life it is best to accept it and move on and focus on the good things. It has been proven that the more the media focuses on tragedy the more tragedies happen. So it stands to reason we need to focus on the good things. Cheers to a stellar new year!

  2. Totally agree, especially that it’s a choice—although it would be hard to argue the benefits of the other side. Have a wonderful new year, Lori, and thanks for commenting.

  3. This is breathtakingly beautiful, my friend. 2012 was a year of up and down emotions – loss, grief, gratitude, blessings and heartache all rolling around bumping into each other on a daily basis.

    It’s funny how New Year’s makes us reflect on a whole year, when really? I experience every emotion in one single day, usually. Not always as pointy or painful as some of the more difficult hurdles I faced this passed year, but also not as dizzyingly joyful as some of the high points – but like a slowly moving wave of ups and downs.

    You are one of my blessings of 2012, though. Big time.

    Love this post, and I’m so grateful to be your friend.



    • Oh Ellie, thanks so much. I love what you said in your comment, how New year’s makes us reflect and yet we experience wave of emotions on a daily basis—so so true. Also not surprising that you would point this out; since you are SO wise (beyond your years). Just one reason I too feel that getting to know YOU is one of my blessings of 2012—and way, way beyond. Here’s to a wonderful 2013. filled with all the emotions that make us who we are. Much love.

  4. … what Ellie said. Me too. A Perfect Post.

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